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EquaNImITYmag.COm
3 5
highest potential
self expression
"You don't know what you have
`til it's gone".
Sam:
Absolutely! Is it difficult to feel
happy? Does this make us feel guilty
in any way?
Karen:
Some people do feel guilty feeling
too much happiness. There is something
called masochistic equilibrium, which
means you grow up in a home that has a
certain amount of joy versus misery that
becomes your comfort zone. For example,
if you grow up in a home that has 70%
joy, 30% pain or misery, then you leave
home and you manage to create a life for
yourself where you have 90% joy and only
a tiny 10% of misery; sometimes people
tend to self-sabotage themselves to bring
themselves down to their masochistic
equilibrium. Your comfort zone is your
discomfort zone because that's what you
grew up with.
Sam:
That is very interesting Karen.
can paying it forward and random acts
of kindness be enough to make us and
keep us happy?
Karen:
Happiness has to come from a
balanced life of many things but with that
said a huge contributor to happiness is
doing acts of altruism. In fact in a study
on happiness they said the three things
that contributed to happiness are: High
self-esteem, connecting with others and
acts of altruism. When you do acts of
altruism you actually get to score all three
out of three because when you do an act of
kindness you are actually raising your own
self-esteem; you feel good about yourself
giving back to the world and you're also
connecting with others because that's what
an act of altruism does. So you cash in on
all three out of three the more you do acts
of kindness.
Sam:
That's wonderful. My last
question for you today is: what fuels
your hunger to bring about global
happiness?
Karen:
I'm just wired to want to make
people happy. I think I've always been that
way since I was a kid, even as much as
making jokes around the dinner table. One
time a couple of my girlfriends and I found
a lost dog on the street and I remember
we found the owners for the dog and my
girlfriends said, Gee, I can't believe they
didn't give us some money reward". My
instinct was surprise at that statement
because I thought wow didn't that make
you so happy right now to see their faces
when they got the dog back? I just noticed
how happy it made the owner to get their
dog back and it has just been an instinct
from early on. We all have that instinct,
I believe, it's not just me. I just realized
that I wanted to use my skillsets more in
that way. I started off in advertising and
learned about writing and art direction;
then I decided at one point in my life that,
and I joke but I'm serious, I didn't want to
use my writing and art directing skills for
evil I wanted to use it for good. I wanted to
apply it to doing what I call "self-help for
people who wouldn't be caught dead doing
self-help".
Sam:
exactly, self-help books; what
happens sadly is we all need them and
we can learn from them but we often
don't take the time to pick them up.
Karen I am so excited that we were
able to connect, thank you for giving
us your thoughts and insights on what
happiness is to you, and for sharing
your tips with our readers. Thank you
so very much.
Karen:
You're very welcome, this was a
blast I had fun.